This week I’ve been as Anukatariina twice at the campus I
haven’t done so earlier so I did some investigation on the reactions. The rumors
had spread among the colleagues belonging to the same team with me. They acted
somewhat surprisingly: Not a single reaction concerning the change in my look, just
everyday professional discussion! Maybe they didn't think such a coming out
would be anything special.
The other colleagues who hadn't been informed acted
differently. When I saw a colleague whom I’ve known as a friend about thirty
years I touched her shoulder and said hello. She winced a bit and as I went on
talking she seemed to flee from the discussion. Afterwards she explained she
wanted to avoid an awkward situation where someone thinks she would know her
although she wouldn’t. She also told she had a terrible confusion in her brain
while she somewhat identified my voice but the person was wrong. We had lots of
laugh after she realized what was going on.
Another uninformed colleague has known me at least for ten
years. I greeted him and he seemed to reply something neutral and not revealing
he didn’t recognize me: ”Nice to see you after a long time…” I replied we just met yesterday which seemed
to increase confusion. Then I said I would be here more than before because I
have more lectures here and he welcomed me – I have been a regular visitor there more
than twenty years!
I had still numerous polite handshakes with other colleagues
and staff but then I also showed my ID card. It took various time to be identified,
from instant ”ahas” to about half a minute processing before the realization of the situation.
I still didn’t tell all the staff so when I went to the
dining room not a single uninformed member of the staff showed any signs
of identification. So I can go on with my investigation.
Lecturing
So far I’ve
adopted the habit to tell about myself to every group of students I teach, both
in male or female look. So far it has not influenced negatively to the
intensity of the learning but at least it has increased my joy and motivation
in my work.
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Bravery and intelligance in equal measures. I salute you. Its a challenge sometimes, but to keep your composure and be yourself is pure, and honest. Which people respect. Andy Bonnor.
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